Ah geeze...

[gekidazejanai]

I'd love to say I'm on a roll, but I'm not. Sitting here in the quiet not feeling good is giving me too damn much time to think. Mostly about how lonely I am. I never meant to be a single dad, I wanted us to be a family. I had everything all figured out, and it would have been great. Then it all fell apart. I love my little girl, I do, but...you can't confide in a little kid the kinds of insecurities and worries of the adult world. They don't understand, and it's not fair to make them. Sleeping alone can be the worst. After a long day, when all you want is someone to hold you so you can relax and let go of everything, a double bed is cold and kind of unwelcoming. I don't know. Maybe I just need to go out on a date or something. Not that it's easy as a single parent who works full time, but other people make it work. Ugh...I think I need to try and get more sleep, being sick makes me morose.

Comments

[gekidazejanai.livejournal.com]

True, I just...don't want to set her up for heartache when she's already doing so much to help me out already. I don't think she knows I've noticed, but the little things she does to make it a little easier for me make me feel kinda guilty sometimes that she even has picked up the skills to do it.

[xlucky-sengoku.livejournal.com]

Ahaha that's kids for you. Mine is the same way.

[gekidazejanai.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I need to give her some good presents this year. New teddy bear for sure.